who's your nanny?

Anti-Cop Hip Hop-"One Time's Got No Case"

Seattle rapper Sir Mix-a-Lot is most famous for his track "Baby Got Back" that was on his sophomore album Mack Daddy. On that same album, however, he included one of my favorite anti-cop songs, "One Time's Got No Case". The song includes the typical violations by police officers including racial profiling and illegal searches, and like "Black Cop", this song also points out that black police are friends of black people.

*SPOKEN*

What you pullin' me over fo' mistuh offi-suh?
I'll be askin' the questions Leroy.
My name ain't Leroy, man.
Heh, all right Jerome, outta the car.
Man, why I gotta be Jerome man? Why can't I be Tommy or Philbert or something?
Just put your hands on the hood Muhammed

*RAP*

It's the man that you love to hate
Coming outta Washington state
Cops don't like my profile
Cause Mixalot kicks much style
So the man is on my trail
He wanna take Mix to jail
If he does, I'll make the bail
Cause I know alot of rich females
I'm shakin' 'em just like this
Keepin' that Porsche in fifth
King County cops don't quit
Even when a young brothers legit
So they follow me wherever I go
I hear 'em on the radio
With a scanner that I bought from the sto'
Cause a brother like Mix gotta know
I'm checkin' them cops with radar
They don't believe I'm a rap star
That my brain is up to par
An I'm ready when they follow my car
I know they wanna spray me with mace
Cause my trunk keeps pumpin' much bass
But they best get outta my face
Cause one-times got no case, give it to me

One-times got no case

The police think I'm movin' them keys
They trip cause I clock much D
They pull a gat an' they yell out "Freeze!"
I'm whippin' out my I.D.
My gat sits under my seat
The cops throw me out in the street
They found my gun like thieves
Officer Friendly has got a new beat
So I show him my gun permit
I told him I roll legit
Give me a test to see if I'm drinkin'
They claim my breath was stinkin'
They had me walk on the line
I walked backwards stopped on a dime
My female just reclines
Cause she knows I know the time
I'm hip to the cop procedure
They get ya everytime they see ya
They stop ya, they cuff ya
They roll ya an' they rough ya
They ask what I do for a livin'
Should this information be givin'?
This is what keeps me driven
Some cops want a brother in prison
So I got me a few attorneys
Just in case a cop wanna burn me
They protect me from the state
Cause one-time's got no case, break it on down

One-times got no case

A cop asks me "What's my name, and don't lie"
And I'm askin' officer "Why?
Why ya wanna mess with a brother like Mix
When you know I'm livin' legit?"
The cop said "Don't get smart.
I tear soul-brother apart"
I said "Well take off your gun, if you wanna get done
An' I'll show you that I ain't the one"
The cop rolled up his fist
Puts the handcuffs on my wrists
Then he threw a straight jab and he missed
A female cop pulls up and she's pissed
But this cop had K-9
A soul sister, yes she's fine
I said "Won't ya help a brother outta bind?"
But that badge was going to her mind
So she stuck a billy club in my back
She said "Don't think because you're black
That I won't beat you", crack, "hit you with the gat"
Her partner starts to laugh

Oooh, hit 'em again. Hit 'em again.

So they took me on down to the jail
P.L.B. came to pay my bail
Then we called Goldstein and Claire
Them's my lawyers
Walkin' up the stairs
To the courtroom dressed in suits
'Bout to give a couple cops the boot
So the female cop takes the stand
Took her oath with the wrong damn hand
My lawyers ate her up like catfish
The other cop pleads the fifth
She lost her job
I seen a few tears on her face
Sorry baby, one-time's got no case

I Picked the Wrong Mutha******** Line!

I read a recent report that swearing might be a powerful painkiller:

Lead researcher and Keele University psychologist Dr. Richard Stephens said the results of the analysis show that swearing can release pain-killing endorphins. He explained that “Swearing provokes an emotional response in the face of stress akin to the flight and fight response” in an individual, which is how the body reacts to a perceived threat or danger.

I have just begun traveling for work and the security lines at airports always trigger the flight or fight response in me. Since I can neither flee nor fight without being beaten or killed, consider this post one giant muthaphuckin' aspirin to deal with the pain of being ruled by idiots, fools, punk muthaphuckas, and fascist bitches.

My first trip was to Atlanta from Baltimore. When I approached the security gate in Baltimore, I could see three lines. From where I stood it appeared that all three lines led to scanners. It appeared that people were being randomly chosen for scanners, so I accepted that this would probably be my first pornoscan. I mentally envisioned a few scenarios to fluff myself for my debut. I chose the middle lane since it appeared that all of them led to nakedness. After I had taken off my shoes and placed my bag on the belt, I could finally see the end of all the lines. The scanner in the line to my far right was not activated; everyone in that line was going through the metal detectors.

Why Bother?

Today I received my statement for my 401(K) account from my last job. The top right corner of the statement lists my personal rate of return:

This period (January 1, 2011-March 31, 2011): 2.22%

For the last 12 months (March 31, 2010-March 31, 2011): 9.27%

Since your account inception (June 1, 1997-March 31, 2011): 1.56%

Almost 14 years of saving has netted me a 1.56% rate of return in my 401(K). I don't have the courage to look at how much my rate of return would have been had I purchased gold instead. But given that I was a liberal much of my life and a conservative until summer 2008, it's not like I knew better. I did believe in saving my money and building wealth. But a 1.56% makes me think "Why bother?"

Indeed Doug French at the Mises Institute has encountered this attitude before. Such an attitude is a direct result of inflationary monetary policy that destroys incentives to save. He writes:

Unfortunately, a central bank's debauchery of the currency serves to raise people's time preferences and impair their judgment. In a blog post recently, I highlighted the advice of life coach and author John P. Strelecky, who advises people to spend their tax refunds on an experience they will remember forever, rather than saving the few hundred or thousand dollars that the IRS may be giving back.

Live your life for today, says the life coach — a couple thousand bucks isn't going to matter anyway. I posted to the Mises Blog to point out how ludicrous this advice is. But most who commented sided with Strelecky:

I think his advice is spot-on, at least given the constraints of the times in which we live. What's the point in saving if inflation will ravage whatever you manage to accumulate?

You play by the rules of the game. Your savings growth will be puny due to pathetic interest rates, erased by inflation, and confiscated by a rapacious state. So go ahead, enjoy the "money" now, while it still has some value.

Most people don't really have a better place to put the money than into a pleasurable experience, which is all you will want in the end.

Gotta agree with the comments. Maybe not trips or other "experiences." But I feel safer with stuff than I do with Federal Reserve notes going forward.

Many days I find myself agreeing with these commenters. Why bother saving for the future at all? Why not just eat, drink, and be merry? What's the point of working hard and savings when your savings will be destroyed by inflation? And if you do acquire gold, it's still not safe from the U.S. Federal Government. FDR already set that precendent. So why not just travel all over the globe to have some memorable experiences before the SHTF?

 

 

Ho-Hum, 'Land of the Free'

Nothing weird about frisking 6-year-old girls in an airport. That's what keeps us free, dude! She could be smugglin' a bomb in her Wonder Woman underoos!

There are two philosophies at play in this air travel nightmare nowadays. You can either refuse to fly altogether, or you can refuse to let these TSA thugs control your life and fly wherever you want despite the fact that you know you could be sexually or physically assaulted for doing it.

It's a tough choice and both ideas have merit. Unfortunately, the first scenario will work only if the vast majority of travelers refuses to fly, which isn't going to happen. So that pretty much means we're fucked.

"Hey, remember when they only used to frisk 6-year-olds?"

Please Tell Me What the Differences Between Prisons and Public Schools Are

Because it is really hard to tell them apart. A public school in Chicago now forbids children from bringing their lunches to school. The children must eat the public school food, go hungry, or both...just like real prisoners. Of course, this is being done for the health of the children.

"Nutrition wise, it is better for the children to eat at the school," [Principal Elsa] Carmona said. "It's about the nutrition and the excellent quality food that they are able to serve (in the lunchroom). It's milk versus a Coke. But with allergies and any medical issue, of course, we would make an exception."

In other words, it's about the desire of a principal to continue asserting her "right" to decide what the children under her should eat rather than their parents. But this should not surprise anyone who reads this blog regularly. Since public school officials already tacitly claim to be better able to educate children than their parents, it makes sense from the authoritarian mindset that these same officials believe that they can provide better nutrition.

Like all central planners, however, the results of the program are not as important as the euphoric feelings that such control over individuals provides the planners. According to the report, many children do not finish their meals:

During a recent visit to the school, dozens of students took the lunch but threw most of it in the garbage uneaten. Though CPS has improved the nutritional quality of its meals this year, it also has seen a drop-off in meal participation among students, many of whom say the food tastes bad.

"Some of the kids don't like the food they give at our school for lunch or breakfast," said Little Village parent Erica Martinez. "So it would be a good idea if they could bring their lunch so they could at least eat something."

That children may go hungry throughout the day and be unable to perform well in class does not seem to affect these authoritarians. However, I'm sure that if test scores go down, the planners will find some new intervention to "fix" that problem rather than allowing parents to prepare food that their children will actually eat.

Just What Government "Services" Would Be Shut Down?

CNN has an interesting summary of the government services that would be shut down if there is no movement on the budget (a full list can be found here). The summary is below with emphasis and commentary added:

Here is a summary of how some services could be affected:

CLOSED/CEASED

No new Federal Housing Administration loans

No new approvals of Small Business Administration loans

National parks, museums and all national forests will be closed

No new patients, clinical trials at the National Institutes of Health

No IRS processing of paper tax returns or refunds; other customer services halted (I'm sure that if you owe money, however, the IRS collection "service" will still be functioning.)

Passports and visas will not be processed except in emergency circumstances

Military personnel will not receive paychecks (This one is a bit surprising since one of the functions of the State is killing people. However, soldiers will continue to get paid they just won't receive paychecks. Nevertheless, given the military worship in this country, Americans might become angry that their Freedom Fighters are not receiving checks and compel Congress to keep the spigot running.)

Personnel who normally answer Social Security and Medicare questions will not be at work

Most government websites will shut down or have limited functionality

Across government, anything that requires permits probably will not be processed

OPEN/UNAFFECTED

FAA, air traffic control

Federal Emergency Management Agency disaster relief services

Social Security checks (Can't have the old people pissed off. They vote.)

National Weather Service weather monitoring

U.S. Postal Service continues mail pick-up and delivery

Customs and Border Protection services continue (No surprise there)

NASA satellite monitoring continues

Food stamps continue

Federal student aid continues

FBI, Federal Marshals, Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives, federal prisons continue to operate (Of course. These are essential after all. And anyone who understands the nature of the State understands why these are essential.)

And members of Congress will continue to be paid, of course.

 

 

Pia Toscano Voted Off Idol

What? Am I supposed to write about bogus "government shutdowns"? I really wanted to title this post "40 Million Minus One," meaning that I was done watching American Idol for the year.

But then I realized a couple things:

A) I'll probably still watch, even though the best Idol contestant in 10 years -- yes, even better than Carrie Underwood (and I called her victory in auditions) -- is gone along with her beautiful bolt-on titties. And B) I really need to drive some traffic to this blog, and this title will show up in a helluva lot more search engine results.

As I've written before somewhere on this blog, I've always liked Idol because it's one of the few things left in life that celebrates true competition and meritorious achievement. But now I'm starting to second-guess that. Pia was hands-down the best singer in this competition, but it's clear that votes are cast based on much more than talent alone. Like popularity, for instance.

Of course, similar to Casey Abrams's elimination a couple weeks ago, it's probably also valid to assume that everyone simply assumed Pia was safe and decided to cast their votes for someone else. All we really found out tonight is that the judges used their save on the wrong person this season, though you could hardly blame them at the time it occurred.

Unlike J-Lo and Randy, I'm not mad at this result. I've come to expect much, much less from the American public over the years. I mean, seriously, Stefano is still in. Based on Wednesday's performances, I expected him to be eliminated tonight -- dude looks like he's getting a proctology exam every time he sings, and I just don't need to watch that.

But with Pia out already, I am a little pissed that my pick for this season turned out to be wrong. I got 9 out of 10 after the round of 24 performed -- I predicted Naima Adedapo over Lauren Alaina, and even though Naima ended up getting a judges' pass, Lauren turned out to be much better -- and I always thought Haley Reinhart got much too rough a ride from the judges in the beginning, and she's now proving me right. Up until tonight I've been virtually dead-on all season, even on elimination nights.

So, even though my initial reaction tonight was to stop watching the show, I know I won't be able to. This year's contestants are so good that no one in the top five will actually "deserve" to get eliminated. Well, except for George Bush impersonator Scotty McCreery -- Son, please stop holding your mic like a gat. For the record, my favorites from the start were, in order, Pia, James Durbin, Casey, and Jacob Lusk (he could honestly win the whole thing just by having the balls to do Ann Wilson), so we'll see how I do from here on out.

You have no reason to believe me when I say this, but after Casey was eliminated so early, my immediate thought was that Pia would probably be the next to go. Funny how I was only a week off.

I want to say how bummed I am that I'll never hear Pia sing again. Or that I'll never get to see her on TV in those fuck-me pumps again. But that would be ridiculous -- she could've quit the contest on her own two weeks ago, driven to Vegas, and started a career that would last her 20 years.

So it's finally time for me to go on record in front of everyone. At the time of this writing -- about 11:26 PM -- I'd guess that Pia's already gotten at least a dozen voicemails from record producers from NYC to LA. She's already won. It's only a matter of time before we know to what extent.

NYC Nutrition Nannies Walkin' the Walk?

New York City's health department employees might want to start packing their own lunches. The department has issued new guidelines for what's allowed to be served at agency lunches. Here's a taste of the new policy:

... No deep-fried foods served at agency lunches. No cookies and cakes at the same time. And no beverages over 25 calories per ounce ...

Some employees have reportedly complained already about such "micro-managing," but the department merely contends that it reflects the agency's attempt to "practice what it preaches."

There's the irony. Any outfit, public or private, has the right to implement its own policy for its employees. It's the health department's imposition of dietary mandates on everyone else in the city that renders it illegitimate and evil.

Hence the true nature of this new policy. Contrary to the claim that the agency is merely walking the walk, it's simply window dressing, an attempt to legitimize these types of draconian public decrees in the first place.

Chris Rock on the Drug War