I competed in the DC101 Chili Cook-Off this past Saturday. Like most localities the DC government imparts obligatory taxes "fees" for the right to use taxpayers' its property -- in this case, RFK Stadium grounds -- so in addition to the private cookoff fees (levied by the National Kidney Foundation and which actually are used to pay staff for this specific event), all cooks were required to pay a $25 tent fee if they wanted to erect a 10x10 canopy.
There are a litany of other rules and regs chili cooks were expected to follow in order to participate, but this one really took the cake. About mid-way through the afternoon, the NKF's cookoff coordinator visited all cooks to inform them that, by order of the fire marshal, propane stoves could not be located directly beneath tent canopies. But in order to enter the cookoff in the first place, all cooks were required to provide certificates of flame retardance for their specific tents!
Just another brilliant use of taxpayer resources.
Yes, your canopy is certified flame-retardant, but is the certificate of flame retardance for your canopy flame retardant? No?! Heavens, you might burn yourself or start a stadium fire, thereby burning others! And with all that chili going around, the potential for secondary explosions is too high not to warrant the protection of our benevolent overlords!
Jeebus, what's next? Is everybody going to have to fart into a tube to mitigate greenhouse gas emmissions?
Posted by: Cal Bittersmore | May 26, 2010 at 05:05 PM